Already Gone
by ChocolateMarshmallows
Summary: Karin had a choice, and she chose death. How will everyone else cope with this? They says it's too late...but is it really? Guess they'll have to figure it all out themselves. HitsuKarin, IchiRuki
1. My Decision

**Well, as I'm sure no one would really like to read the ramblings of one of their co-writers………………..I'll make this REALLY quick. SO………..My friends and I LOVE this pairing and I felt like writing something like this. I'm sure you're sad to know that I don't own bleach. cuz if I did shiro-chan and Karin-chan would definitely be together and rukia and ichigo would be married by now………….Plz read&review! ^_^**

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_Amid Maples, autumn's whisper_

_Pled softly: "Die with me!_

_My fate so fickle and evil –_

_Has coldly betrayed my anew."_

**_Karin's POV_**

Once upon a time…

I died, twelve years ago.

And I know that today, I will die again.

I also know that today, I will die as a shinigami, and not just some random substitute's little sister.

But this time, the only difference is that I chose to die. I decided that this was for the best of everybody. And I promised myself that I'm not giving up anything.

I smiled cynically at my own reflection in the mirror, and tried to push back down the lump in my throat. As I scribbled down a few more sentences for my brother, I gained back a little more of the confidence that I had. After all, I had months to consider my position. Besides, this solution would prevent harm to anymore innocent bystanders…

"And it's not like anyone's going to go crazy just because some third seat officer disappears all of a sudden…" I muttered to myself, folding the note in half.

"I won't exactly miss much either."

Ha…a complete and utter lie.

"Besides, I might even enjoy my new role."

Hmn. Lie number two.

"And some people might even be happy when I'm gone…"

Well, probably true, anyway.

When I finished, I knew it was time. To go. I looked around the Tenth Squad office, knowing that this was going to be the last time that I'll ever see this place again. I took in the usual order and neatness, and the familiar smell of chocolates, just one last time.

"Goodbye…Taicho. Um…. well…good luck with your paperwork and all that stuff, I suppose. I wished I could've had the chance to say goodbye to you…but…oh well."

I smiled a little, remembering how he used to yell all the time at Rangiku and me for knocking over the piles on his desk…

I felt the necklace I wore around my neck, the one of the blue dragon…just one last time. I stared at it, knowing that I had to give it back. Finally, I brought myself to rip it off my own neck, and then just placed it gently on the large wooden desk.

I stood there, balling up my fists and releasing them, not wanting to leave just yet. But then, as the tears started welling up, I forced myself to run out the door into the cool, wintry, evening…_and towards my death_.

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**So how was it????????????????? Tell me if you liked it!!!!!!!!!!!!! Believe me, if you did, I'd get a lot more motivated to write. I already have the next few chappies down……………………but I just have to retype it…………………..so remember to READ & REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyway, my laptop _broke down_ the other day (as in my little brother actually _dropped_ it on the FLOOR), so I'll just have to use my home computer and my flash drive for this story……………….meaning it might take a while………………………**


	2. What Does Ichinii Know?

_**So……….second chappy……………..remember to read & review!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Same old, same old, of course. And by the way……….yeah, this story was quite depressing…but believe me, karin's not 'running away' from anything…in fact…she's doing the opposite……I mean she's doing this to 'prevent harm to anymore innocent bystanders', remember??? Yeah. Just to clarify. Well…Hope you like it!**_

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_I answered, "My dearest, my darling,_

_Mine too. I will die with you."_

**Ichigo's POV**

"What's going on?"

"I don't know, but it seems to be something really big!"

"I heard from Tsukasa that someone from the Tenth Squad was found in the forest. Dead!" Whispered another shinigami, "And it was a seated officer!"

I froze. No…

"Yeah, they say it was the Kurosaki girl. _The_ Kurosaki Karin! You know, that prodigy girl with the wind Zanpakutou?"

I could feel my heart stop. Literally.

No. I don't believe it.

I spun around and grabbed the one who had spoken by the collar and yanked him up.

"Where did you hear this?!" I snarled menacingly.

He recoiled, looking afraid.

"…K-kurosaki – Taicho, I-I…."

"Tell me!"

"I…I don't really know…it's just what everyone else says…"

"Why you little-"

"ICHIGO!!! What in Kami's name are you doing strangling your own subordinates?!!!!!!!!"

I looked around again. This time finding Rukia with her hands on her hips, looking bemused. I released the man immediately.

"Rukia…where's Karin?" I rasped, my voice suddenly hoarse.

She stopped staring at me immediately, and her eyes dropped to the ground. And I knew, just from her expression, what had happened. What everyone else already knows. And then it hit me, squarely in the chest. But I still tried to laugh it off, even then.

"Oh, no, of course not…! How can that happen to Karin? She can take care of herself…right, yeah. I mean, I hate to say this, but she's probably even stronger than I am! Besides, even I can feel her reiatsu a whole mile away when she's not suppressing it…"

Rukia stares into me some more, and I could feel her getting even more somber.

"And do you feel her reiatsu now? No, Ichigo. I tried to forget what I saw…but I was there…I saw with my very own eyes! So how can I lie to you? I want to lie, but I can't! Not anymore…Ichigo, Karin's not here anymore!" Her voice was shaking.

"And Ichigo, I really don't know how to say this, but your sister...has been missing ever since you and the other taichos left for Hueco Mundo. We looked everywhere…and we also hoped that maybe she had sneaked off with you and Hitsugaya-taicho or something…but then, just yesterday….we found her in the forest."

That finally stopped me. I stumbled a little towards her, and place my hand on her arm. "Rukia..."

My fingers trembled, and I felt strange. "Can I…I need to see for myself, Rukia."

Rukia slowly looked up into my eyes, and I could see the tears of anger and helplessness on the tips of her lashes.

"Rukia…where is she?!"

She frowned, crinkling her eyebrows thinking hard.

"All right then…Ichigo…please. Just...come with me."

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_**All right I admit it…..this chapter was a bit rushed. Yeah….well, when I'm typing, you're probably going to find a lot of typos cuz I try to post as quickly as I can. Especially since my chapters are so short, as I'm sure you've noticed. Normally I'm supposed to post about four chapters a day if I have time, but nowadays I've been quite busy with finals…………….*sigh* well I know this is like the hundredth time I've said this, but PLEASE READ AND REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thx!!!!!!!! Just let me know people are actually reading this……………**_


	3. Matsumoto's Thoughts

_**K peoples here's the story…my laptop LITERALLY broke down the other day (little brother SPILLED HOT CHOCOLATE ON IT!!!!!!!!! The little…grr…) so for now, I'm jjust going to have to use my home computer until I get a new one…!) ugh…well as usual…thx so much for reading this and does anyone even read my ramblings at the top of my chapters????? Also…please review and comment to let me know how I did…I swear if you review on my story, I will definitely read and review for yours!!!!!! Besides, I'd really like to know what people think of this story and if ANYONE EVEN READS IT AT ALL!!!!! Ok that's enough…just plz read on…=)**_

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**Matsumoto's POV**

You know what I really don't get? It's how quickly things just seem to happen around here, and I'm never aare of it, especially when I should have been. Just like Hinamori, Aizen, Gin…and now _Karin_. With Kairn, it had happened so fast, so suddenly, that it took days for it to finally sink in. Karin-chan has always been a great addition to the 10th Squad, and having her here made things a lot more fun and lively. Even Taicho was happier when she became 3d seat officer. Besides, having her here actually allowed him to sleep a few hours a day, which is a great improvement from before. Weeellll, you can't exactly blame me for wanting to take a few breaks from writing all those hideous reports, can you???????

But really,_ Karin_?! Karin, of all people…we've grown so close over the last few years, and now this…? What the hell could have happened to make her make a decision like that?! I mean..did she do it herself, or did someone else…

I shuddered, not liking either idea.

No…Karin is a smart girl…she wouldn't just willingly give up her life like this. There's got to be something behind all this.

But then, another thing I really don't get is her and taicho. How am I supposed to tell him…? How is _he_ going to take it? Right after he left on that 'mission' for Hueco Mundo with the others, he told me to look after Karin. I heard they had a minor 'disagreement' (wonder what it was this time????? Usually has something to do with the incredible amount of love letters arriving in the 10th squad's mail…) and Karin wasn't talking to him. He said that if Karin did anything reckless or stupid, make sure to stop her…and the way he said that? I can tell…he has feelings for her. I mean , like, BIG TIME!!!

Believe me, I never expected anything like this to happen. Anything _but_ this. This is…all wrong. This shouldn't have happened! Why Karin, of all people? And after what had happened in the human world?

There are so many things I don't understand…and I probably never will. None of them make sense…and now two of the most important people in my life are gone. What's going to happen next?

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_**Yeah I know all this chapter was was basically Ran-chan's thoughts. I know for a fact that some people don't like reading thoughts….so I'll make sure to post the next chappy really quick. Like maybe at like twelve o'clock tonight……we'll see. Make sure to REVIEW!!!!!! **_

_**Your humble writer, **_

_**chocobleach**_


	4. Hitsugaya's Guilty Conscience

**Hey everyone….as usual, thanks for reading my story!!! Please review and comment to tell me how I did!!!!!! AND YES YES I KNOW my story is going super slow but I get inspiration at different times of the day so you know………..and I'm trying to update really fast to make up for the shortness of my chappies so please forgive me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I get lots of help from my friends too…well…they proofread my stories to tell me how I did so that's help…….One of my friends made this website and she's posting a HitsuKarin story that we wrote together. Well…I wrote the first one, To Live, and she's currently at work on the sequel, To Die. The site is going to be published in a week or something so I'll post it so make sure to go check it out! Well, here's the story!!!!!!**

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_**Toshiro's POV**

When I heard the story, I didn't believe it. Or, should I say, didn't want to believe it. I hoped and prayed and begged kami to tell me that it wasn't true. But…the second I heard it…_I_ didn't believe it, but my heart did. It didn't even give a second thought about it.

Because, deep down, it knew exactly why this was the upcoming result. It might have even expected something like this. But still, all I felt was pain. And I never even knew a heart could hurt so much.

It hurt so bad, in fact, that I couldn't think straight. All I thought about was her.

_***A f l a s h b a c k*****_

_"Captain Hitsugaya. This is your new third seat, Kurosaki Karin. She just graduated from the Shinigami Academy, and Yamamoto-Soutaicho has ordered this new change. We would also like you to know that the new shinigami Taicho, Kurosaki Ichigo, has expressed some of his con –"_

_"Arigato, Sasakibe -fukutaicho. I can take it from here."_

_Sasakibe gave me a look, and then backed out of the room, leaving the girl in my office. I turned towards her, then took a deep breath, and began._

_"Welcome to the Tenth Squad. Here, we believe in hard work and strength of mind. Please make yourself comfortable and Matsumoto –fukutaicho will gladly give you a tour."_

_She almost choked on her tea, and gave me a funny look._

_"TOSHIRO?! YOU'VE-"_

_"You are to address me as Hitsugaya-Taicho."_

_"Yeah. Whatever. But TOSHIRO!!! THIS IS HOW YOU'RE GOING TO TREAT ME?! Well why didn't you tell me earlier before I practically threatened Yamamoto into giving me a position in Squad Ten?!!!" she crossed her arms, looking annoyed._

_I looked at her blankly._

_"Well it's too late now isn't it?" I smirked._

_She glared._

_"Anyway, I have work to do. So if you'll excuse me…"_

_"NO FRICKIN WAY IN HELL!!! I haven't seen you for a month and all you do is give me some lame old welcome speech!!! No way I'll leave you alone now!!! So get your butt outside and actually breathe in some real air! Besides, the trees will appreciate it very much," she asserted, kicking over more paperwork._

_"I would appreciate it if you could leave those reports alone. We only just alphabetized them this morning, Kurosaki-san," I said, not looking up._

_"It's KARIN!!!" She said through gritted teeth._

_"Mm."_

_"Grrr, Toshiro do you really want me to make you?"_

_"Mm?"_

_"All right then I suppose I'll just have to have a nice little chat with that really nice old lady I just met the other day in Rukongai…who had a great liking to telling stories about _back in the days…_BEFORE her children left her alone in that pitiful place that she has to call her HOME. And now she has to fend on without her cute little Shiro-chan. Oh, what will she do???" Karin sighed, and then gave me an evil grin. (MAJOR HINT!!!)_

_My eyes flickered up. It didn't take a genius to figure out just who Karin was talking about._

_"What the hell has she been telling you?"_

_"My, my…Language, language! Bad Shiro-chan!!! How many times do I have to tell you that there are absolutely no bad words coming out of the mouth of a child I raised myself?!" Karin smiled._

_It was my turn to glare daggers at her._

_"Oh yes, of course, there's more – 'Shiro-chan was so cute! Oh yeah, like the time when he went swimming for the first time and got chased around by a hermit crab! Or was it a starfish? Oh excuse me, dear, my memory is not doing so well these days… Anyways, that reminds me of the summer when he got honey into his hair and I had to shave his head bald…! Oh, the other children had such a good laugh…' "_

_I glared some more and crossed my arms defensively._

_" 'And is Toshiro too busy to visit me now? I haven't seen him for months! It seems like all he does now is work. But how can he be too busy to pay his old granny a visit once in a while?' "_

_"All right Kurosaki! I get it!"_

_She grinned some more and finally stopped._

_" You know what you should do, right Shiro-chan?" Karin said suddenly, looking a little more serious. "You granny is pretty disappointed that you haven't visited her in so long."_

_I sighed. "I don't have –"_

_"Ugh Toshiro come on it's about time you go outside for a little while, don't you think? And you know I'll just make you. You know I have my ways. SO come on!" She grabbed my arm and proceeded to dragging me off of my chair and across the room._

_"Besides, she's making you favorite chocolate pastries and she got ahold of those candy trifles that you really like!"_

_I was silent as I followed Karin out the room._

_"You planned this, didn't you?"_

_She turned around and gave me another bright smile. _

_"Of course."_

_"Che. I should've known."_

_"Uh huh."_

_"How did you meet Oba-san anyway?"_

_"Oh, I just happened to bump into her at the market. Completely by coincidence, of course."_

_"Right."_

_"Yeah, and it's Karin! Would it really kill you to just pronounce those two syllables?????? How many times do I have to tell you anyway???!!!"_

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**Well, that's chappy #4. Hope you enjoyed!!!!! Make sure to finish reading my story! And please REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want to know how I did with the little flashback. IT might have been a little confusing, but my friends wanted something like this in the story, so I had to oblige Yeah my friends and I just LOVE this pairing! I mean who doesn't think Hitsukarin is cute???????????? (btw, we're like hitsumomo or hitsuhina haters right now….so don't expect any of THAT in this story!)**

_**chocobleach**_


	5. Complicated Matters

**Thank you to all those people who favorited my story!!! SO glad you like it. I was so surprised. Thank you, thank you……..I'm so happy, I'm almost in tears!!!!!!!!!! I know I haven't updated in a while. So sincerely sorry…I actually wrote this chappy a long long time ago…I just didn't type it up. Here it is…**

**AND I KNOW I HAVE SHORT CHAPTERS...I just need lots of time to THINK. PLEEZ UNDERSTAND ^''^**

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Rukia's POV

_Why are things always so complicated?_ It seems like just as soon as we get rid of one enemy, another foe appears. Either that or _something else_ goes seriously wrong. I'm even starting to think that it's all -

"Rukia! Ichigo! What are _you _doing here?!"

I looked down. It was Renji, standing in front of the huge black door.

"What does it look like?" Ichigo growled. I glanced at him, feeling uneasy.

I touched his arm. Renji stared at his face, looking confused.

"Renji…he knows," I said quietly.

Renji looked bewildered for a few seconds, then sighed. "Gosh…Ichigo, I know how you feel right now, really I do. But I'm sorry, I can't let you pass. I'm situated here to prevent people from coming in or out and I'm afraid there are no exceptions. They're still…running some tests on her. **No one **is allowed to pass through. Yamamoto's orders," Renji said, jabbing his thumb at the number 'FOUR' in big bold letters on the door.

"Karin is my sister!" seethed Ichigo, reaching for his zanpakutou. "And there is _no fucking way_ you can know how I feel right now, Renji. And you know why? Because _you don't have a sister_!"

I panicked. "Ichigo, no! We'll go see her when they're done! For all we know, Karin may even be alive! We just have to wait for a few more hours!" I said urgently, grabbing his arm.

"But I have to see her!"

"You're wrong."

I glanced nervously at Renji. He looked…mad…and _different_. Really different from usual.

Renji stared at Ichigo in the eyes. "You're wrong, Ichigo. I have a family. We're all family here, in Sereitei. We wouldn't be able to survive if we didn't treat each other like family. You're my family. Rukia's my family. And so is Karin. So I care, Ichigo. I really do care about how you feel and everyone else."

Ichigo stared right back.

Then, just as suddenly, he slumped onto the ground, as if his legs didn't have the strength to carry him anymore. He rested his head on the wall and fixed his gaze on the floor. Renji finally relaxed a little as well.

"Rukia, what am I going to do? What am I going to tell goat-chin and Yuzu?" I hardly recognized the hoarse voice that came out of Ichigo's mouth."

I bent over next to him and placed my hand on his shoulder. "Don't worry…we'll find a way. It's going to be all right. Everything's going to be all right, Ichigo." I tried to make my voice comforting, but I _hardly_ convinced myself.

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**Thank you, thank you, and thank you for reading!!! Please REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!!**


	6. A Distant Memory

_**a l r e a d y g o n e**_

**~ A n o t h e r D i s t a n t M e m o r y ~**

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_"Ne, Toshiro, HURRY UP!!!"_

_Glare._

_"Shut up, Kurosaki. This was all your fault anyway."_

_"How was this all my fault?!"_

_"You were the one that tipped over the big bottle of paint back in the Twelfth Squad!"_

_"Well, if you hadn't touched my"-_

_"Ugh whatever just stop screaming like a defenseless little girl," said an aggravated Toshiro. "It makes it look like I'm kidnapping you," he added, picking up the pace._

_"WHAT THE HELL?!!! Don't you dare call me that!!! Defenseless?!!!!! I can kick Madarame's ass seven times in a row without getting a single broken bone!!! Or bankai Ichi-nii's unmentionables when I really feel like it…! Or…or dump more paint over Hitsugaya-taicho's hair!" And with that, I sat up a little straighter in Toshiro's arms and dumped what was left of the dark blue paint over his head…__**and the result wasn't quite so pretty**__…_

_"He stopped instantly. "K…kurosaki…you……KUROSAKI!!!!!!" _

_But I was already on the ground with paint flowing all over my shinigami robes, snickering evilly._

_"c…can't breathe…" I laughed, pointing at his blue hair and messed up haori._

_"Kariiin…" he said, in that calm but dangerous tone of his. Somehow he sounded even scarier that when he was yelling his head off at me earlier today when I accidentally tipped over some pink and blue experimental paints in Twelfth Squad and got them all over our robes._

_"Um…okay……Time to go!" I got up and ran as fast as I could to be away from Toshiro when he really explodes._

_"KUROSAKI!!! GET BACK HERE!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS A DIRECT __**ORDER**__!!!!!!!!!!"_

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	7. While You Were Gone

**I know how some of you guys were a bit peeved at my last chapter of a distant memory and thought it was pointless. It was based off of the idea of one of my friends, and they really wanted me to write something like that cuz my story was a _bit_ depressing. I know, it might not have made sense to you, but just interpret it any way you want to into anything that makes sense to you. TELL. ME. IF. YOU. LIKED. IT! REVIEW!**

**By the way, thanks to everyone for their comments and advice. It really helps!XD**

**And I can't tell you much about my story. But I suppose I should say that there is going to be a HAPPY ENDING…even though that's already telling you guys too much. I don't really know why I wrote something like this anyway…I just wanted to write something _different_, I guess. I mean, just about all of the hitsukarin stories I've read has something to do with Toshiro training Karin in the human world. Have you noticed? I was also in a pretty depressed mood when I wrote the first chapter, so that helped as well with my inspiration.**

**THIS IS A TOSHIRO x KARIN story, for those of you wondering… I HOPE YOU GUYS JUST READ THAT! CUZ THAT"S HOW I REPLY TO YOUR COMMENTS AND REVIEW! Plz help the world and review!=)**

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**_Toshiro's POV_**

The moment I walked out of the Senkai Gate, I knew something was wrong. I could even feel it in the air.

Just then, I felt a presence near me. I instantly stopped and stood where I was.

"Who's there?" I called out, narrowing my eyes.

A blue haired woman in shinigami robes suddenly stepped forward, out of the shadows.

"Hitsugaya-Taicho."

I scrutinized her suspiciously, deciding to be cautious around her.

"Yes?"

The woman smiled slightly.

"Hitsugaya-Taicho. Glad to see you back. I am Hanasowa Soshiyuke, and I'm here to let you know of something that occurred during your absence on Yamamoto-Soutaicho's orders. One of your subordinates was very badly injured, and we think that-"

"Matsumoto?" I asked urgently.

The messenger smiled grimly. "No. I believe it was a seated officer by the name of…" She thought for a moment, scratching her head "…**Kurosaki Karin**."

My blood instantly ran cold. My eyes immediately riveted to the pale face of the soul reaper.

"What did you say?" My eyes were blazing.

"Kurosaki Karin. I am to notify you of this unfortunate…" she paused, "…incident. We do not know much at the moment though. In fact, all we know is that _something_ is very wrong with Kurosaki Karin. We do not even know if she's still…" her voice faded away.

My hands shook, and I could feel the blood draining away from my face. I tried my best to speak.

"Tell me…H-how did this happen?" I asked coarsely.

"Of that we do not know. Like I said before, I'm simply here to notify you of this incident," the messenger replied curtly.

I swallowed, then clenched my fists.

"Do you know…where she is?" I strained.

"Kurosaki Karin is currently situated at Fourth Division, but no one is allowed to-"

"Arigato. Thank you for…letting me know."

Just as soon as that was said, I began to run as fast as I could. I was panicking, and my mind was in complete turmoil. A million questions were flowing through my head at once, and I couldn't think straight at all. All I knew was that I had to get to Karin, as quickly as I can. I owe her that at the very least.

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**Now…thank you for reading…please REVIEW! I know that about 300 people read this story, and I only got like 26 reviews, so I had better get a GREATER amount of reviews from people. O_o**


	8. How Karin is Faring

**I know how you guys feel about my ultra-short chappies…I'm sorry. =( Come on! I update every week so can't that make it all up to you?! Thank you to those of you who reviewed…I'm glad.**

**Private Messages are appreciated just as much as reviews though!**

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_**Hanataro's POV**_

"Unohana-Taicho." I bowed low.

"Hanataro-kun." She nodded to me, getting up from her position at the foot of Kurosaki Karin's bed.

"Ne, Taicho…how is she?" I asked quietly.

Unohana-Taicho sighed. "She's not doing so well at the moment. In fact…her condition is worsening. And we can't do anything about it, I'm afraid."

"My eyes widened. "But Taicho! There's got to be something we can do…!"

She shook her head, and said even more grimly, "It seems like there is something in her bloodstream that…well, it's impossible to get it out now. It may be poison, but we cannot be sure. This is not something we've dealt with before, and…Twelfth Squad is doing their best, and that's our only hope right now."

I couldn't keep the surprise out of my voice. "But…Unohana-Taicho! We can't just let her-!"

"And what can we do, Hanataro?" She questioned me, looking me in the eyes.

I was silent.

"Hanataro. I understand, you and Kurosaki-san have grown close of the years. So I perfectly understand how you would be worried about her right now. But at a time like this…we have to wait. Time will tell."

She then walked towards the door. "Isane will perform a check up on her in a few hours. You should go get some sleep."

I smiled weakly.

She was about to step out, but I just remembered something.

"Wait! Taicho!" I called.

She turned around to face me. "Hai?"

I struggled for words. "You…you'll still try your best, right, Taicho? To help Karin, I mean."

Unohana smiled a little at me.

"I certainly will," she said softly.

I smiled for the first time in days.

"Arigato…Taicho-san. Thank you. So much."

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**Thanks for reading! Make ure to tune in next time for RENJI's Point of View! =)**


	9. A Captains' Discussion

**For those of you asking, I decided to write this story mostly because of…the following reasons…**

**1) I LOVE the HitsuKarin pairing! Always have, and always will…**

**2) I love to write.**

**3) I'd really like to write something a bit more different than typical Hitsugaya x Karin stories.**

**4)I've had this idea for a couple of months already.**

**5) I felt this story should be more _depressing_, and I was in a very _put off_ and discouraged mood when I began this story.**

**6) Chocolate rocks! (because there's going to be a lot more chocolate scenes in this story than _ever_!) XD**

**Please answer my question : If I were to write another HitsuKarin story, would you read it?**

**By the way, story requests are really appreciated because my creative mind can usually come up with a plot right off the bat. So if you have any ideas, just PM me please! Reviews are most definitely welcome as well! ^_^**

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_**Renji's POV**_

"Nani…?! Hitsugaya-Taicho? You…you came as well…?" I stuttered.

Hitsugaya's jaw was clenched as he glared at Fourth Squad's enormous wooden door, not saying anything.

"Uh…um. Can I help you?" I asked stupidly. I could see him tighten his fists, then unclench them. I gulped. Ok…not good. _At all_.

"Karin's in there," came a different voice

Of course. It's Ichigo. He's still here with Rukia, after all. He kept his seat against the wall, not bothering with formalities. Hitsugaya finally shifted his icy gaze from the damned door to the new speaker.

"What…Toshiro? What the hell are you doing here?" Ichigo asked warily, still leaning against the wall.

They were silent for a few seconds, and then Hitsugaya finally spoke. "Kurosaki Karin…is my subordinate." He stared at Ichigo coldly.

Ichigo sneered. "Is that it? Is that why you came? Just because she's your _responsibility_? How kind of you, _Hitsugaya-Taicho_, to come all this way," He scoffed, crossing his arms. "Must have been troublesome, as Karin was just another little subordinate, and you're _so busy_ with all your work."

"Ichigo!" Rukia gasped. "How can you say something like that?"

I could sense Hitsugaya tensing. But his eyes were still piercing holes through Ichigo's head, not giving away anything.

"What are you talking about, Kurosaki?" His voice was as indifferent and calm as always.

Ichigo glared up at him, eyes like daggers. "You know _perfectly well_ what I'm talking about. What you said to Karin before you _left_?! Everybody knows!" His voice shook with rage.

Hitsugaya glared back at him with controlled anger, the muscles in his face tightening and becoming scarily visible. He pronounced his words slowly and carefully, as if he were talking to a kindergartener who had just broken his mom's favorite vase. "You have _absolutely_ _no idea_ what had happened between Karin and me. And neither do you have _any_ right at all to speak about her like that, the way that _you_ have treated her. So I suggest you to close your mouth and discuss things that you have a _full_ understanding of. Or at least _receive_ a full understanding of the things that have happened while you were too busy _saving the world_ to spend any time at all with your _family _members." His words were stinging Ichigo like ice, I could tell. Ichigo stiffened immediately.

"That's none of your business."

Hitsugaya smirked. "And neither is it yours to discuss myself and my squad members."

Everyone was silent.

"Now…Abarai-fukutaicho. Kindly step aside. I would like to see my subordinate, Kurosaki Karin," Hitsugaya suddenly shifted his attention to me.

I could feel the beads of nervous perspiration on my forehead. "Well...you see, I'm not supposed to let anyone pass. Soutaicho's orders. Maybe you could wait a little while?"

"I need to see Karin." His voice was like steel. "I'm her captain."

I grimaced, sweat gathering on my brow.

"I-I'm sorry…but I can't let _anyone_ pass," I muttered nervously under the icy gaze of the silver haired captain.

His knuckles were white from his gritted fists.

"Did you not hear me? I am her captain, Abarai," he said dangerously.

"I…_please _wait with Kurosaki-Taicho until I receive new orders, Hitsugaya-Taicho!" I scrunched up my eyebrows, trying to be brave. Then I wiped the sweat on my brow and tried to maintain eye contact with Hitsugaya's scary turquoise blue eyes. He just stared at me for what seemed like hours.

Lucky for me, the most unexpected thing happened after a few minutes. Hitsugaya suddenly dropped his intimidating gaze, unclenched his fists, and slackened his shoulders. His face wasn't so angry anymore. It had more of an anxious and concerned look. "All right…I'll wait." His voice was cracking again, eyes filled with a different emotion…I really couldn't tell what it was. Hitsugaya Toshiro was always so unreadable. I breathed a sigh of relief.

"Arigato, Captain Hitsugaya, Captain Kurosaki," I said gratefully.

Again, I was unable to read either of their reactions. In fact, I didn't even _understand _their expressions. Anger? Guilt? Remorse? _Regret_? I never will know. But I do know…

Kurosaki Karin. It all started with _her_. I don't know her well, but I know she's a real strong shinigami. Everybody talks about how she had saved Ichigo's and some other captains' lives before on some mission. She's strong. She's _scary_. She's going to be a great death god someday if she reaches her full potential. _If_.

But that has changed. _That_ has changed days ago, when we found her in the forest. I already know her condition too well – she's not going to survive. In fact, she's probably **already gone**. But they just can't say.

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**Thanks for reading!**

**Question : IF I WERE TO WRITE ANOTHER HISTUKARIN STORY, WOULD YOU READ IT? Please let me know if you have any ideas…HK Thank you!**


	10. Just Another Check Up

**Hi everyone! For those of you wondering, the reason why some authors don't accept anonymous reviews is because they either forgot to or didn't remember to turn on their anonymous reviews feature. Of course, there are also authors out there that don't want anonymous reviews because they're afraid of Spam. But **_**I**_** accept anonymous reviews, so don't worry! Haha. Just letting you guys know. ;-)**

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_**Isane Kotetsu's POV**_

It was time for another check up. _Kurosaki Karin_'s check up. Ah, yes, another little check up in a place like Fourth Squad sounds innocent enough, does it not? But just _what_ is a check up?

A _check up_ is actually just a chance for us to see if the patient is still _alive_. And most of the time, they're _not_.

Now, it's not like the Fourth Squad doesn't like taking care of people. The truth is, we do, and we're really happy to help anyone who's sick or injured. But we hate doing "check ups". Because we already _know_. This person was not going to be living for much longer.

Of course, Captain Unohana doesn't know any of this, or at least, pretends not to. That's a good thing, because no one likes discussing it.

"Kotetsu-fukutaicho. Please report to Room 406 for the next check up. Patient number 10034…" It came from the loudspeaker.

Sometimes, the loudspeaker _is _useful. Other times, it's just plain annoying.

"Arigato," I muttered, hurrying down the hall.

I took in the slim figure on the bed. She was so pale, and somehow the sharp contrast between her pale complexion and her ebony-colored hair made her seem even more beautiful than usual.

I hurried towards Karin's bed, wanting to know if Karin was alright.

First, I tried finding her pulse. I could definitely feel _my_ heart beating fast.

_Thump. Thump. Thump._

I frowned in concentration. Then I checked her neck.

Nothing.

I gasped. Absolutely no movements, no breaths, no heartbeat…

"Kurosaki-san?! Kurosaki-san!" I said urgently. I started shaking her, but her eyes remained closed, and her body limp.

"Kurosaki-san? Wake up, Kurosaki-san!" I yelled. Her head was bobbing back and force, I was shaking her so hard. I didn't care. Karin Kurosaki is a death god. One of the _strongest _ones I know. She couldn't just die. Besides, I am not ready to accept it if one of _my _patients die.

"She isn't going to wake up."

I whirled around, finding Unohana-taicho in the doorway.

"Taicho-san…" I murmured.

She walked over, placing her hand in Karin's.

"Yes…I expected this, Isane. It was poison in her bloodstream, and this particular one had absolutely no cures or antidotes. We have never seen one like it before. We could have sucked out the poisoned blood, but it was already too late. She would've died from blood loss. The poison had already spread out, so it was only a matter of time," Unohana smiled sadly, pulling Karin's blanket up over her still body.

I stepped back, trying to hold in the tears. We deal with this all the time, so why…

But I've always really like Kurosaki Karin. She's always been so kind, and she helped everyone a lot, especially Hanataro and me.

Taicho stepped back suddenly. "It's time," she said quietly.

I bit my lip. "H-hai, Taicho."

_"**From this moment on, I proclaim that Kurosaki Karin, Third seat officer of Tenth company of the Gotei Thirteen, has left this world. She is truly in a better place…"**_

The rest, I've already heard about a million times. Unohana-taicho was so solemn, she sounded so serious when she gives a parting speech, that I didn't know how people couldn't tell that this was just another memorized speech, written especially for departed shinigami. I cried silently to myself, feeling like an idiot for not being able to save Karin-san. What's going to happen to her family now, I wonder?

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**Gomen. Sorry it took so long. So sorry for the extremely short chappy. I'll try to update as fast as I can! I'm trying my best…Please forgive me!**


	11. A Realization

**Many thanks to everyone for their wonderful reviews and comments! If it wasn't for my readers, I wouldn't even bother to post any of my stories online for anyone to read…Thank you, thank you!^_^ Well, first of all, sorry for the short chapter, AGAIN. But in my defense, I value quality over quantity. So please forgive me! I'll do my best to make the next chapter as long as I can.**

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"_You took it from me once, and started your journey. You may stop here. You may rest. You may die if you wish. Or you may go on. If you stop, you stop in shadow. The light awaits you, but to reach it, you will be transformed. You will be changed. You will not be as you are now. Know that before you make your choice. _

"_Know too, it is your choice to make."_

**_Toshiro's POV_**

Honestly, I didn't know what to think. She's gone. Karin left. Perhaps Ichigo was right.

"_Hitsugaya-Taicho!"_

I didn't remember anything else…except for running for a very long time. I had to get away. I had hoped that it was _not_ Karin, that it could've been someone else, even Matsumoto. Not that I don't care for _her_. Just that…I knew _she_ would _survive_. But those hopes were crushed seconds later.

I kept running, my vision blurring. But then I stopped, just on instinct.

It took me some time to realize where I was. I stared, wide-eyed, at the little river. I felt the sand beneath my feet, still as warm and dry as always.

I remember this place. This was the place where Karin and I always go to think about things. To stare at the stars. To talk. _Together_. I couldn't remember for how long we have been coming here, to this sandy little beach, but it had been months since the last time we've sat down and talked to each other like we trusted each other, like we really paid any attention at all to the conversation.

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

But I knew I _couldn't_ cry anymore. Not anymore.

I bent over slowly, touching the golden–brown sand with my fingertips. I flipped my hand over, grasping a handful of sand. But the problem was, it kept seeping through my fingers, almost like I was holding water. I tried again and again to keep a firm hold onto the little bits of sand, but it never worked. I could do nothing but stare at my palms.

I let it go.

Just like with Karin.

I remember the day before I left for Hueco Mundo. She could've gone with us. After all, Sou-taicho had given her special permission to. She could've lived if she had gone with us. But no,_ I_ had to be there. _I_ had to make her change her mind at the last minute.

My fingers closed around the remaining bits of sand I had left in my palm, balling it up into a fist. I couldn't just let what little I had left of her disappear into nothing like that.

No. I want to keep the piece of her that I still had.

In my heart. Yes. I'll _always _have her there.

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**Gah! Sorry again for the short chapter. But this was a fast update, don't you think? **

**Now, make sure to tune in next time for…*drum roll*…KARIN'S POV!!! Curious yet? Next chappy is going to be pretty long, so it MIGHT take me a while. **

**Unless I get LOTS of reviews to make me happy enough to finish typing it up really FAST. **


	12. Reflections of A Life

**Hey guys! I know, I know, I know…it's been quite a while, but I have a great excuse! :P Luckily…Well, my computer crashed when I was on mangafox, and it wasn't very pretty. That's basically the whole story! So sorry for the long wait! I've been trying very hard to continue writing, and it's been very challenging to get into Toshiro's head, then Karin's, then Ichigo's again…but I'll make sure I finish this story, because I absolutely HATE unfinished stories…don't you guys worry…even when I'm an old woman who can barely hold a pen, if that's how long it takes…**

**On with the story! **

**Karin's POV**

Was everything really going to end? Fade away? Turn into a dream that I won't even be able to understand even when I can still remember it?

Part of me hoped so.

The other part, not so much.

But I suppose it doesn't really matter anymore, does it? All that matters now…is that **it will end**.

_This is the end._

_Of this life. My life._

What do I feel now? What else do I have to say for myself?

_I'm sorry…for doing this. _**To everyone**_._

_For everything._

_So sorry._

I'm the traitor now. I betrayed Soul Society. I betrayed all shinigami—my family, my friends, my Taicho, my subordinates.

_Gomenesai_.

***Flashback—Remembrance—14 Years Ago**

_"You again."_

_"Hey, Toshiro, I was just thinking…could you help us on our next game? Or maybe even join our team officially?"_

_He paused._

_"…I can't help you guys. Ask someone else."_

_I pouted. "But Toshiro, Ichigo's still "busy" somewhere and no one else would help us…"_

_He looked annoyed. "Oi, oi, now that you know who I really am, you should call me by my title. _Hitsugaya-Taicho_. Got it? And obviously, because I'm a Taicho, I'd be busy with my work. As you can see clearly right now."_

_He sounded like he was talking to a five-year-old._

_"Texting?" I asked, kicking up an eyebrow. "A girlfriend?"_

_The phone snapped shut…again…the usual routine…_

_"Forget it." Toshiro started walking away._

_I smirked. "Aww, Toshiro, you don't have to be so shy about it!"_

_A vein bulged in the back of his neck, but he didn't say anything, just continued walking away._

_"I'll see you around, Toshiro!" I turned around, grinning to myself like a little maniac, and ran off._

_An exasperated sigh was heard by several passer-byers. _

"_It's Hitsugaya-Taicho…"_

**10 months later…**

_"What happened to your cell phone?" I snorted._

"_Shut up already! I told you…stupid Shinigami Women's Association…" He glared at the brand new looking device._

"_It's pink!" I laughed, climbing up onto the railing next to Toshiro._

_This time, he actually took the time to turn around and glare daggers at me._

_I smirked. "Hey, you know, it's not so bad, Toshiro. It fits you very well."_

_Another vein popped in his forehead. "Urusei…" he grunted._

"_And I can even get you a matching cellphone charm for your birthday! Ans some pink heart rhinestones to go along with it!" I smiled to myself, making mental notes. The phone flipped shut._

"_Kurosaki…don't make me shut your mouth for you…" _

"_Try," I said cockily, leaning over into Toshiro's face. I stared into his eyes, deep pools of turquoise, and he stared back._

"_You want me to?" he asked quietly, not able to look away. His tone changed…a lot… I leaned in closwer and closer to him, all the time staring defiantly into his eys._

"_What, you too scared to?" I whispered. _

_And then it came to me. I kissed him._

Our first kiss.

**13 years ago**

_"Toshiro…I know, I've only known you for a year. But…can you promise me something? You're the only other Soul Reaper I know other than Ichi-nii and Rukia-san…"_

_"What is it?" he sighed, turing around to face me. I avoided his gaze._

_"It's just…" I tried to remember the excuse that I had carefully thought up, just a few days ago._

_"Um, Urahara Kisuke has been explaining to me how all the shinigami stuff works, there, in Sereitei. Andd he said—he said that when I—when I die…I'll…" My voice faded away._

_Toshiro sighed again. "You'll forget everthing, he finished for me, and the expression in his eyes softened._

_I looked away. I hadn't wanted to think about this, but I couldn't help it. For the past few days, this has been then dominant thing on my mind. "Y-yeah. And Toshiro-kun, can you…promise me you;ll looke for me? Help me remember again? Whe I die…You're my best friend, you know. I'd like to remember."_

_Toshiro gazed back at me, as if searching for something within my eyes. He stood up slowly, the exhaled again. His lips turned up slightly. "Karin…Yes, I promise you. One day, I'll find you again and bring you back with me…I promise."_

_A sense of relief sweeped over me, and my face broke into a wide grin. "Arigato, Toshiro," I said sincerely. "You promised me."_

**ahaha I'm just plain evil, aren't I? Another short chapter…after all this time…I haven't changed at all have I? XD anyway…I put like 6 flashbacks in this chapter…so I took some out. They're gonna be in the next chapter that I find worthy of a nice long flashback…**

**Review!**


	13. When Your Spirit Dies

**Must REVIEW! Please! T.T**

"Wake up!"

_I'm…dead…aren't I?_

"Wake up, you stupid girl!" the person growled impatiently.

_I…I don't want to wake up_…

Just then, I felt a stinging slap across my face. "This gotta teach you, you stupid girl," the voice said smugly, and he sounded like he was smiling. I turned around groggily, still not wanting to wake up.

_I thought_…

"Open your eyes, dammit!" the voice snarled again. I felt something cold against my cheek, and my head lolled to the side, eyes flying open. The first thing I saw was sand. Heaps and heaps and heaps of sand. I looked up, and gasped. A face was glaring down at me. A scary face, with the blue hair on top.

"You!"

The man smiled, all traces of him losing his temper while I was sleeping hidden away all of a sudden.

"Hello, Karin. Yes, I'm who you think I am. And no, I'm not dead yet," he snickered, as if he had read my mind.

"Grimmjow," I breathed, "You're still alive."

His smile widened.

"So are you," he replied. I looked around. I knew this place from everyone's descriptions.

"Welcome to Heuco Mundo," Grimmjow chimed, grabbing my hands non too gently and pulling me to my feet. I felt dizzy still, and wobbled around. "Of course, you're not going to be in your best health here, as you should already know. I think you know what you were bargaining for with Aizen-taicho, eh?"

I said nothing. _What was there to say?_

"So, poison, eh? _Ludinhong. _It wasn't that painful right? Ludinhong's not painful, but _deadly_. Aizen –taicho was very easy on you. The process should've taken a few months for the Ludinhong to actually kick in. Hell, I didn't even know that Ludinhong still existed until Aizen-taicho gave it to you on that _fateful_ day two months ago, " Grimmjow continued, smirking the whole time. "But there was a _bargain_. Wait until your _brother _hears. That idiot doesn't even know that I am still alive. I wonder how long it's gonna take him to realize that his sister decided to become an _Espada_? Especially when she did it for _him_? For _his_ safety? Well, you, Karin-chan, are a great addition to the Espada team, and from this day forward, you will only answer to the orders of _Aizen-taicho,_ you understand? You belong to _him_ now."

I listened to Grimmjow's little speech with a blank and neutral face, but inside, I felt like I was dying. Drowning in the freezing sand. From this day forward, the Kurosaki Karin that was the daughter of Isshin and Masaki, sister of Kurosaki Ichigo and Yuzu, proud and loyal warrior of Soul Society no longer exists. This is a new Karin. One whose spirit is never going to come back again.

"Well, don't wanna keep the Lord Aizen waiting, do we? Let's begin fulfilling your part of the bargain now, shall we?" Grimmjow suggested, with a glimmer in his eye. "Follow me."

_Did I have a choice?_

**All right let's face it; this story is going NOWHERE. SO hey everyone, you better be reading this, cuz this is important. I'm gonna skip to the end of this story. Skip the whole part of Karin training in Hueco Mundo, living her miserable life under Aizen's command. Skip Ichigo's and Toshiro's pain….all the way to a decade later, when everything spices up. More specifically, when Karin and Toshiro MEET again. Anyone like my idea? Anyone? Please let me know in a REVIEW. I'll be starting a new story, so make sure to go check it out later as well!**

**Thanks for reading my babblings,**

**~choco~:D**


	14. Is It Really True?

**A/N: Hi everyone! I'm baack! I know, I haven't updated in almost over a year…I should be guilty. Yes, yes, of course I am. T.T This is my New Years present to you guys. To make things very clear, this story is still in the Aizen arc, so all the Arrancars and Traitors are still in Hueco Mundo, undefeated. Enjoy~**

**One more thing; everybody who reads this - Please click the review button and just tell me your thoughts. That's not too hard, now is it? o.O**

**Already Gone – Chapter 14:**

_**Toshiro's POV**_

I couldn't remember how long I sat there, staring into the deep blue water.

_"Toshiro…Love is like water. Water, in all its forms. It can squeeze between your fingers like your own tears. Burn and freeze your heart at the same time. It can evaporate before your very eyes in no more than an instant. Making a reservoir to hold your love is the most difficult task in the world."_

Granny had never looked so serious, whispering those words, lodging them permanently in my memory. Now, I finally understand.

"Taicho-san."

I spun around, finding a disheveled Matsumoto looking at me worriedly.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly. "I am so sorry, Taicho."

I turned back to the river. "It's not your fault," I muttered.

"No, Taicho. You told me to look after Karin. But in the end, this is what happened. It _is_ my fault," Matsumoto contradicted, looking pained.

"It isn't your fault," I repeated, standing up. I began to walk away. What else was there to say? None of this is my sake-loving fuku-taicho's fault, no matter how guilty she feels.

"Wait! Taicho…go check the office. I think there's something that you would want to see there," she spoke up s

uddenly, "I'm sure."

I stared at the ground blankly for a few seconds, not knowing what to say.

"All right," I murmured. Then, I left her there, staring into the deep blue water and the reflection of the moon.

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_**Ichigo's POV**_

"I don't believe you."

"Kurosaki-Taicho," Unohana murmured. "My sincere apologies…It's too late. Please understand."

"Hitsugaya-Taicho!"I heard someone yell in the background, but everything sounded fuzzy to my ears, except for one phrase…

_It's too late._

I clenched my fists.

"Where…where is she? Tell me!" I demanded.

Unohana averted my glare and continued to stare at something right behind my body. "Inside," she replied.

I gave her one last hard stare and then flashstepped into the fourth squad.

As I raced frantically down the hall, everything seemed to happen in slow motion. I couldn't run fast enough, couldn't be next to my sister soon enough. I was met be several "Kurosaki-Taicho!"s but most appeared to be trying their best to avoid me.

Suddenly, I ran into a dark shape, momentarily losing my balance. I heard an inward gasp.

"Kurosaki-san," a familiar voice was coughing out.

My eyes softened slightly. "Hanataro." He, of all people, should understand.

After Karin's unpredictable death in the human world, Hanataro who was one of the few who was brave enough to befriend another Kurosaki. To think of timid little Hanataro as _brave_ wasn't an easy thing to do, until I saw him in battle and in full preparation mode. Hanataro would do anything for his friends, and this loyalty in him made him a very valuable friend.

He looked up at me sheepishly, like he always does. This time, though, there was something different in those dark eyes…

"Kurosaki-san…Please follow me." With that, Hanataro began walking down the corridor and soon led me into a small, dimly lit room.

His eyes shifted from my feet to the bed.

My mouth had by now shifted into a thin line, and there was a loud ringing in my ears. I brought myself to step up to the bed.

There she was.

_Karin. _My sister. The sister I wasn't there to protect…_both_ of the times in which she needed me the most. First, in the human world. And now, Soul Society. How pathetic could an older brother be?

_My sister._

My face contorted into an ugly mask of pain and guilt. This girl is my sister, this girl no longer breathing – I could no longer deny it.

I stared down at her, the pale pretty face, eyes set in a smile; feeling the sadness creeping into my emotions and overtaking the shock. What surprised me was that I felt no anger towards anyone – other than myself. That's right – I couldn't blame _anyone_, this time. Especially not Toshiro.

What surprised me even more was the sense of peacefulness in Karin's expression. Her face showed no trouble, no worry – an expression I had not seen on her face in months. Her brow was not furrowed, and her mouth was in a soft line. This was the closest I have seen Karin to being _happy_ in a very long time.

"I'm sorry," Hanataro whispered.

I dug my nails into my palm.

"Stop saying that! Why the hell are you even apologizing?" I demanded.

Silver tears dropped to the ground in front of Hanataro.

_Plop. Plop._

A sudden realization hit me in those moments. I couldn't do anything. I couldn't go back in time to fix anything, and most definitely could not bring Karin back from the dead.

I could not do anything – other than to grip Karin's cold, frozen hands and to let the tears flow freely.

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_**Yuzu's POV**_

Ever since Ichigo and Karin died and decided to live in Soul Society, it's been just Otou-san and me. I knew a lot more than anyone ever told me, starting from the day Karin died. Ichi-nii has never been the one to confide in people, especially about anything he knew that would worry us. Karin was no different.

The day after Karin's death, I knew that Otou-san could have left with them if he wanted to. I knew that somehow he had the power to switch between these worlds. But he stayed. He chose to stay with me in the human world.

At first, I wished that I could have just killed myself and then join Ichi-nii and Karin-chan in Soul Society. But…

Oka-san's promise. She had made Ichi-nii, Karin-chan, and me promise her that we would live life to the fullest, no matter where it led us. And that we had to be happy, that the days of happiness in one's life are fleeting and should be treasured…

…and hold on to the ones we love. As always.

Why is that so hard?

As I banged pots around in the kitchen, that was all I could think of. Oka-san was gone, and Ichigo was gone. And even Karin had left to Soul Society. What will happen next?

Suddenly, I felt a wind next to me, ruffling my bright pink skirt.

"Nani?" I gasped, startled. I gaped as I turned to my right.

"Yuzu-chan," he quavered, gripping the wall. His jaw was set in a hard frame, his eyes glazed over.

The last time I had seen him like this was the day Karin-chan went to Soul Society. And it scared me. I reached forward to touch his arm.

"What's wrong?" I asked urgently.

Otou-san did not flinch at my touch, even as the soapy water seeped into his sweater.

"Soul Society…They just sent us a message about Karin-chan. She is hurt…very badly," Otou-san answered in a low voice.

I instantly paled.

That's when I noticed a black butterfly fluttering into the kitchen and resting itself on Otou-san's shoulder. Then I understood.

"We have to go see her. Don't we?" I whispered, slowly drying my hands on an old towel. "We have to."

Otou-san grabbed my arm, eyes looking like they were on fire. "Come. It's about time."

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**A/N: Thanks for reading! See, an extra long chapter! I hope this makes up for my, erm, extra long absence?**

**Now, I have a confession to make. The reason I haven't updated in so long mostly has to do with A) My huge writer's block, and B) The disorganization of this story. I have been stuggling…but I really don't want to leave this story (my **_**first**_**!) unfinished. I promise to do my best!**

**PLEASE _REVIEW_.**

** Or ELSE...I WON'T UPDATE IN ANOTHER TWO MONTHS...those of you who don't care...well, you hurt my feelings. T.T But those of you who do, PLEASE CLICK THE 'REVIEW' button and tell me your thoughts. Flame me if you want, just give me some advice. :)**


	15. Noting the Differences

**Ahem. I know...I have some explaining to do... I'm SO SORRY! Especially to all my wonderful readers who actually reviewed &/or followed this story even when the author disappeared for six months. SORRY... OK, well, most of my long absence (again) was due to the fact that I lost my notebook. But I found it _now_! So it's all good...yup...that's right... And honestly, when I began this story, I didn't even know where this story was going to go. But also, people, you know, get over their obsessions...In other words, one can only have an infatuation for _so _long. But I'll finish this...I'll try. Don't worry.. :D**

**As long as I have my writer's block, check out my other story, _Chicken Princess_. It's really light, and not very depressing _at all..._It's quite the opposite of Already Gone. **

**Here's the summary to Chicken Princess:**

**All hell breaks loose when Karin finds out she's the long lost granddaughter to a major-medicine-company-owning gazillionaire. Her new role as an heiress comes along with gorgeous, genius Toshiro, who just so happens to be the heir to a rival company. **

**Naturally, the two become quick rivals at their prestigious high school. But soon, an innocent mistake led to (literally) a worldwide misunderstanding, and Karin and Toshiro are being forced into an unhappy marriage.**

* * *

**Already Gone**

**Chapter 15 – Noting the Differences **

**_Grimmjow's P.O.V._**

The girl really changed.

The first time we met, she was feisty as a little dragon. But now, she appears to have _really_ grown up. She most definitely was not a little girl anymore. There is something, something inside her that has changed. Something is missing, now.

When I look at her, I see not just a girl; but a woman. A woman who has seen enough of this cruel world to lose her last bits of hope, faith, and optimism.

There were dark circles under her eyes, and she seemed to weigh nothing at all while I pulled her along. I glanced at her slim little arms, noting how _fragile_ she looked.

"So. Karin. I trust you've been doing well?" I asked, merely trying to make standard conversation.

She was silent for a few moments before answering.

"I think you already know the anwer to that," she finally responded tiredly.

I raised my eyebrows in response. "Really."

She was right, of course. Just one look at her, and the bright, aggressive, smart-talking teenager she _was_ would be the last person you'd connect her to.

We walked along the desert, taking our sweet time. Karin seemed unsteady on her feet and I had to literally drag her behind me. She was slipping; and I gripped her arms tightly.

"Come on," I muttered, "We shouldn't keep Lord Aizen waiting."

"Of course," she replied, with only a little hint of resentment and something else in her voice.

* * *

_Flashback-_

"Do you understand now, Kurosaki-san?" asked Aizen, looking as polite as a business associate. He rose from his huge gray throne, striding towards where Kurosaki Karin was standing at the rear of the room.

She was staring at the floor, silent.

When she finally spoke, her voice was little more than a hoarse whisper. "You mean…I have to…give _everything_ up?"

My face remained unreadable. There was never of moment before that when she looked like a little girl, unsure and pained.

Aizen leaned closer, until he was little more than a few centimeters from her face, and smiled charmingly. "Of course. That is our deal. In repayment, of course, I shall not hurt a single hair of your _friends_."

He reached down and pulled Karin's chin up to look into her troubled gray eyes. She stared back, looking tortured but somewhat determined. Her choice was already made.

"How much time do I have?" she asked quietly.

"Oh, around three months. That is enough to consider my offer, no? But of course, I shall not hurt your little friends. That is, if you don't forget our little deal," said Aizen. "You should make up your mind soon, Karin."

Her gaze remained fixed on the shiny white floor.

"And yes, that is all – enough to think about for the next few months, no?" Aizen asked, not unkindly, and still smiling down at Karin. "Now, Grimmjow, kindly escort our guest out? And see to the new arrangements."

"Hai," I answered automatically, already grabbing the girl by the arm. "Come on," I whispered in her ear.

_-End Flashback_

* * *

_Flashback-_

"So, a Kurosaki, eh? You must be like Ichigo," I remarked, sizing up the girl.

Her eyes blazed. "_Do not_ compare me to my brother. Ichigo and I are two different people, and don't you forget that," she responded menacingly, as she drew her zanpakutou.

I smirked, somewhat impressed by her fierce little temper. "I'll keep that in mind, _Karin_."

Her reply was to leap from her cat-like position and attack me with equal ferocity. I quickly drew out my sword to block the attack, mostly on impulse.

Without a word, the girl drew back her sword and then attacked again with lightning speed.

I smiled to myself as I deflected the blow.

"Tell me, where is Hitsugaya-taicho?" she hissed.

I paused before answering.

"With the rest of his friends," I said nonchalantly.

She glared, and I continued to smile, but didn't say anything.

"Not going to answer my question," she asked finally. "Then please step aside."

I stood my ground. _Huh. I can't believe she just asked that._

"Orders are orders," I reminded her.

Karin smirked and pointed her sword at my face. "All right then…I'll just have to _kill _you." With that, she jumped back a few feet, preparing for combat.

My smile grew wider. "Go on then."

_-End Flashback_

* * *

And now, just a few short months later…

This was the result.

* * *

**Now...If you want chapter 16 to come out SOONER than last time...REVIEW!**

**...In fact, if I don't get at least, say, 8 reviews, I'll even _put off _posting the next chappy. YUP! That's right...I'm evil...so you better review.**


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